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Post by achromatic on Aug 10, 2021 21:02:54 GMT -5
The huff of air that left his nose was the closest thing to a laugh Eshek had gotten so far. "Are you sure you didn't hit your head too hard?" his voice was clearly trying to stifle a laugh that threatened to emerge, as he sat next to her sprawled out form, her bewildered expression confirming what he thought, that she most certainly was crazy, and a hard whack on the head probably drove that point home.
"Yeah yeah, you're not my type either," he rolled his eyes. He wasn't like his deadbeat dad who slept with one cat after another. In fact, he was openly disdainful to the thought of having kits. He had announced more than once, in the dramatic yet deadpan way he always treated the world, that the bloodline would surely end with him, for he had no desire to continue this curse of a bloodline to another set of kits. As irrational as a curse was, Bermondsey still believed in it wholly. After all, everything that had been said had truly happened; there was bad luck and then there was too much of a coincidence to not be suspicious.
He was snapped out of his thoughts when she lunged for the sushi, and he immediately took his paw off the lid like he was in the way of a feral animal lest she accidentally bit his paw assuming it was some food or something. Was this sushi really that delicious? Was it really that appealing?
Hooking a paw and pulling one towards himself, quickly before Eshek devoured the entire box on her own, he gave it a sniff. Raw fish and something else, something with a bit of a strange, sharp tang. He gave it a skeptical glance before taking a bit. Huh...it wasn't bad. The fish certainly was tasty, the rice had a bit of a weird taste to it but he didn't mind, it complimented the fish, and whatever it was wrapped in was tasty enough.
"Not bad," he spoke, chewing with his mouth full, "guess I could steal another sushi from this place another time." As long as he didn't get food poisoning from this one.
"Whaddaya mean I'm not your type?" Eshek said incredulously around the mouthful of sushi, genuinely offended and confused. "I'm everyone's type." She took another angry bite, glowering at Bermondsey and chewing threateningly.
Not bad, guess I could steal another sushi from this place another time. "Don't talk with your mouth full!" She scolded him with her mouth full, reaching out and hitting him lightly on the grey foreleg closest to her. "It's rude." Was she kidding or was she just a child with a set of inexplicable rules left over from kithood that she didn't question? Who knew. But she was secretly incredibly pleased to see Ber eating; she was nothing if not a housewife who lived to make sure everyone around her was well fed and taken care of. She watched him with a happy little face, eyes crinkled as she chewed. Pretending to be full, she pushed the rest over to the tom.
"Here," she added, pushing over some sticks of jerky as well, after having torn open the packaging with one clawed paw on the wrapper and her teeth pulling at it fiercely. "S'good." She hadn't taken any, but she knew from previous experience, when a Foreign Affairs hunter had brought her breakfast in bed back in her beautiful white bedroom in the mansion. She'd always had food brought to her on a silver platter; she'd never had to go out and get it herself, and though she missed the former with a terrible, lonely ache, the latter was certainly an adrenaline rush of fun and freedom and making her own decisions for her own life instead of being a pawn in some Nemesis' game. Now, she didn't know which she preferred.
As she chewed, her eyes wandered away from Bermondsey and over to a shopping trolley under one of the carpark lamps. Her eyes narrowed into a mischievous, grinning little grin. "Ohohoh, I know what we're doin' after dinner. We just have to wait thirty minutes so you don't throw up. Pool safety." There wasn't a pool in sight.
dm me if you want to listen to me ramble about the interstellar soundtrack
2,314 posts
Post by achromatic on Aug 13, 2021 19:48:32 GMT -5
"I feel like that's a lie you keep telling yourself," he smirked, "but keep pretending, I'm sure it'll work out." It was the closest thing to humour Bermondsey gave her; there was a sense of amusement twitching on his whiskers. He snorted at her comment before purposefully chewing with his mouth full, loudly smacking his lips to emphasize what an utter pig he could be if he wanted to be. The smug look on his face was evident in the crinkle around his green eyes, as he made a big deal about swallowing the rest of his food, and licking his chops just to piss her off.
He didn't know what it was about this moment but in a way, it almost felt like a childhood he had missed out on. He had grown up all too early; his family needed him to be a successor despite not being an heir by the time he was a trainee. He had never been allowed to socialize with the other kits, he had never truly had anyone he could call a friend. Was this what it felt like, to...enjoy someone else's presence? To exist without needing to exist for something? It was a curious feeling, one that Bermondsey immediately pushed down the very moment he started to feel it.
Friendship wasn't a thing he was interested in. Nor companionship. He had lived most of his life on his own now, walking that lonely path in which no one knew his name. Surely he wasn't going soft, was he? To actually find someone tolerable? Was that going soft? He wasn't in the mood to have this sort of internal dilemma but it hung onto him like dew on grass.
Taking a bite out of the jerky, he found that it tasted decent. A bit salty and really chewy, but decent. He shrugged in reply, as if he had any right to be a food critic right now. "I guess it's not that bad," he replied, almost a compliment at this point, "but I don't have anything to compare to anyway."
Raising a brow at Eshek, he tilted his head, curious to what she was talking about. "Should I be concerned about this?" he asked slowly, still chewing, "should I be concerned about you?"
I'm sure it'll work out. Eshek glowered at Bermondsey as he ate his sushi, head low and ears slightly back, her lip curling up and twitching as he made it as gross as possible. A slightly high-pitched growl rumbled in her throat, sounding more like a kitten's than a full grown ex-proxy's. "Yeah, I'm sure it will," she muttered, voice still close to a growl.
I guess it's not that bad. Eshek rolled her eyes, snatching the jerky packet away from Bermondsey and taking a grumpy bite for herself. "You're never happy about anything," she replied with her mouth full, breaking the rule she was growling at Bermondsey about only a second earlier. "It's delicious. You're stupid."
All of this, of course, reflected nothing but her affection for the not-Warden.
Should I be concerned about this? A grin spread slowly across Eshek's face. Should I be concerned about you? "Oh, definitely," she replied quietly, getting to her paws and leaning in close to Ber, eyes stretched wide and wild, before letting out a happy little titter and bounding across the dark parking lot to the shopping trolley sitting in a pool of yellow light. She had a funny run when she wasn't aiming for speed; she loped too much up and down, front half too high in the air, then lower half too high in the air, like a kitten who'd only just learned how to move quickly. Barely pausing to gather up the momentum, she leaped clumsily into the trolley with a metallic clash and immediately hopped up with her front paws resting on the end of it, like a ship's captain standing at the helm.
"Push me!" she commanded Bermondsey regally without looking back at him. She had her sights set on where the road they'd walked down earlier suddenly plunged steeply downwards, making a perfect, dangerous rollercoaster of asphalt and buildings and night. "Then," her eyes glinted in the lamp light, and if this were a movie it would be a close-up shot of her head slightly inclined downwards and her eyes staring at the camera and her mouth slightly twisted in a thin, crooked, deadly smile, "when we're there, get in."
"You just noticed?" he blinked at her, as if that was the most obvious thing in the world. "I was raised with class," or as his parents would call it, being pretentious enough to never show that he liked anything because that just meant you were easy to please. He snorted, pushing Eshek's face away from him when all of her half-eaten jerky spittle came flying towards his direction. Gross.
He groaned internally at the wild look on Eshek's face; he had picked up on her facial expressions pretty quickly, and this one? This one meant trouble. As she bounded into the distance, he followed in his slower steps, frowning when he saw the cart, wincing at the crash. Push her? He frowned, looking up at the giant...thing. How the hell was he supposed to get that to move? It was plenty bigger than he was, that was for sure. He gave a half-hearted push, but it didn't do anything.
His furrowed brow turned to their surroundings, noticing a large sign leaning on the side of the road, propped next to some barrels, probably some type of storage for something in the shop. Well, if he could knock down that thing, and cause it to bump into the barrels, and they could surely knock into the cart...if there was anything a cat was good for, it was for knocking things over. Climbing quickly atop of the sign, it wobbled before slamming straight into the barrels...except he didn't realize that it wouldn't just knock the cart forward, so now he found himself on a wobbly makeshift cart himself, except it was just a board on a bunch of barrels now rolling down towards the street.
Oh god, oh god, he was definitely going to find himself dead at the bottom of a ditch tonight.
(genuinely this thread makes me piss myself, i'm tryna eat my lunch at uni and im just tryna hide my face in my sleeve so i dont look like a freakin giggling clown)
"AAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" Eshek shrieked, standing upright at the side of her trolley with her forepaws perched on the metal rim, watching as Bermondsey whizzed along beside her on his horrible little cart. "AAAAAAAHAAAA-" Every time she thought she'd gotten over how funny it was, she looked at him again and burst into more laughter, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. YOU IDIOT! YOU'RE SO STUPID. YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE BEING CLEVER AND NOW LOOK AT YOU-AAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHHAHAHH."
They sped along side by side down the abandoned street bordered by empty lots on the right and warehouses with broken windows on the left. The gas station disappeared behind them. "THIS IS THE BEST NIGHT OF MY LIFE!" Eshek screamed into the night, bounding over to perch up at the front of the trolley and throw her head back, eyes closed and a huge grin on her face as the summer wind whipped over her face. "EW, BUGS." She spat wildly as gnats flew into her mouth. "STILL GOOD, THOUGH." She looked over at Bermondsey, snorting repeatedly as she almost burst out laughing all over again. "You wanna jump over?" she shouted at him, teeth looking impossibly sharp in the yellow glare of the street lights whipping past. "You got about three seconds. One, two..."
The reason being, the steep hill was looming up. It was San Francisco-steep - looking at it from where they were on the road, Eshek could only see the asphalt petering out, then humid blue-black night sky beyond; the rest of the road was somewhere below, like a waterfall. "Think fast, Ber. HEY!" She turned suddenly and looked back at him excitedly, claws curled around the front of the trolley and eyes huge and wild and exhilarated with raw delight. "I JUST CAME UP WITH A GREAT PUN! YOU'RE A REAL BER IN MY SI-" She vanished over the crest of the hill, taking the joke with her. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Post by achromatic on Aug 30, 2021 17:01:44 GMT -5
"HOW THE HELL DO YOU THINK IM SUPPOSED TO MOVE THIS?" he shouted above the din, "THATS A BIG TROLLEY AND I'M A SMALL CAT, ANd I'M JUST NOT SURE HOW WELL THIS PLAN WAS THOUGHT THROUGH." This was what he got for following an insane cat on her little soul-searching journey, wasn't it? He totally deserved this. If it wasn't the family curse that got him in the end, it'd surely be Eshek, and she wouldn't even have to try. It'd be just another Tuesday for her.
This was absolutely the worst night of his life. He was rolling down a bunch of barrels like he was some clown training for the local circus, if the circus was run by a batshoote insane cat who had issues and decided to train a bunch of ferrets with rabies to do gymnastics around a ring of fire or something. This was exhausting, and gods, he was definitely going to fall off this barrel soon.
Eshek couldn't have asked sooner, because the moment she asked, he steadied himself before leaping forward, eyes closed as if he assumed he'd just go under the trolley and end up as road kill instead, but hey, he was still alive, clutching onto the metal frame, his fur standing on its end as his teeth gritted, in the same way a dog would look with its head out the window speeding down a highway.
Crawling into the trolley properly, he let out a sigh of relief, finally relaxing when suddenly they went over the hill and he felt himself being catapulted into the air. Goddammit, he thought dryly as he fell through the air. Not again.
"OHHHH, BABY, IT WASN'T THOUGHT THROUGH AT ALL," Eshek screamed, the words followed by the loudest laugh imaginable. "WHOOOOOOO!" She threw her head back and shrieked into the light-polluted night.
When Bermondsey joined her in the trolley, she grinned at him, still tittering behind her joyously bared teeth. Her eyes were huge and wild. Her shoulders shook with the close-toothed laughter that couldn't be heard over the wind and the wheels of the trolley shaking across the tarmac. She hugged him to her and squealed delightedly. What a great night!
And then they were going over the hill. Still clinging to Bermondsey, Eshek screamed like she was on a rollercoaster, her tail fluffing up when they momentarily became airborne. At some point they passed a security camera pointed at the road and Esh pulled Ber closer to her with one foreleg and grinned at it, flashing a piece sign as best she could with cat paws, like it was one of those cameras that took a photo of you on said rollercoasters. "They always overcharge for those," she added to Ber in an aside, suddenly calm. She was back to scream-laughing a split second later.
Then, suddenly, the road was running out. Turns out, the city must have run out of funding for it and just abandoned the project, because it suddenly crossed a train track - "man, what a way to go out, huh?" Eshek commented as they sped towards it, and then flew over it; "oh, neat, no cat splatter tonight I guess," - and then just ended completely with a massive oak tree conveniently placed right in the middle. "WHAT LUCK!" Eshek squealed - and then the trolley crashed into the tree trunk. They went ass over, the trolley capsizing so they were almost in a metal cage, trapped between the trunk and the inside of the trolley. Eshek groaned and slipped out of the little gap, staggering. She promptly collapsed onto her face, though she was still fully conscious. She rolled over, looking at Bermondsey. "Wanna go again?" she joked weakly, giving him a dizzy half-grin. Her eyes had that sort of glaze over them that they only got when she was completely content with a night's events, her appetite for adventure and chaos fully sated. It was rare.
dm me if you want to listen to me ramble about the interstellar soundtrack
2,314 posts
Post by achromatic on Sept 11, 2021 19:05:52 GMT -5
He was flying. He was falling. He was spinning out of control. He was going to die. He was going to live. He had never lived like this before. He was...he was...oh god he was going to throw up, wasn't he? Eshek's screeching made him wince as he tightened his grip on the cart, his teeth gritted as it swivelled, his green eyes squinting at where they were going. Not that it helped at all; he had no idea where this little joy ride would take them at all. He barely registered the way Eshek was clinging on to him having the time of her life.
As he flew into the air once more, he was almost certain he'd fall out of the cart, but she grabbed him and steadied him once more as she screamed once more, and he was gripping on, fur fluffed up in the wind, with nothing but air to hold onto once more. He didn't even know what a train was, but the tracks seemed dangerous and Eshek's words confirmed it. He winced as the road ran out and they were on the gravel, his teeth gritted as it moved through bumpy ground, and a screech left his mouth as they slammed into the heavy oak, and he finally couldn't grip on anymore, and he flew into the air, but perhaps it was a fortunate thing too, because the cart immediately capsized, and he was now on the ground.
He wasn't sure whether the world stood upright anymore, his head was still spinning as if there were rubber ducks making circles around his head. Was he alive? Was he dead? "Again?" he rasped, trying to find the earth under his paws, "is this what you do for fun?" He could feel his heart racing. If the family curse didn't kill him or drive him insane, certainly this cat would. Funny how curses work, huh? He wasn't the one going crazy but he was going to be killed by a crazy cat; that was just poetic justice.
Bermondsey was certainly looking a little green. "I think I'm going to be sick," he groaned, "are you just not scared of dying or are you properly crazy?"
